


Out, Damned Spot

by polybi



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Episode: s02e17 Welcome to Storybrooke, F/F, Letter to Emma, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Spot on heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-31
Updated: 2017-03-31
Packaged: 2018-10-13 08:24:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10509993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polybi/pseuds/polybi
Summary: In the aftermath of S2E17, Regina writes Emma a letter concerning Snow and a discovery Regina made. Originally published on FF 3.18.13





	

My dearest Swan.

I don’t know what I have done. But I need your help.  Desperately. 

 

It is about your mother.

She came to me yesterday.  She wanted to die.  She wanted me to do it.

Now I know what you are thinking.  She’s still alive, you say.  I know.  And there was a part of me that wanted to do it. A part of me that wanted her to pay for all the pain she had caused.

Then there was the other part.  The 17-year-old girl that saved a sweet, innocent young lady from a runaway horse.  A person I thought would be a friend forever.

The part of me that loves Snow White.  And, believe it or not still does.

It was the first part that took over.  I ripped her heart out.  Swan, please forgive me, but that part of me that hated her wanted to squeeze that heart so badly, I could taste it.  Dearest gods, I still can.

Then I saw it.

That dark spot.

When she tricked me into killing my mother, it’s probably when it started to grow.  Maybe even before.

It starts small, but then it grows.  The heart darkens. Your thoughts darken. Until finally soul becomes dark.

You become evil.  You become... _me_.

I could not allow that to happen.  Not to Henry.  Not to you my darling.  And believe it or not, not to Snow.

I knew if I told her what could happen, she would not believe me.  So had to show her the way I did.  I gave my best “evil” smile, feigned delight, and told her that the spot would grow and she’s become evil. 

And then....please forgive me and I hope our son forgives me as well...I played my “Henry card.”  That she would become so dark that she will destroy her family. David. Henry. And you my love.

After she left, I wanted to tear my heart out myself for what I had said.  You know that you and Henry are my heart....the only things keeping me together, especially after what happened to Mother.  And I said a lot of things in anger.  Some directed at you.  For that, I am sorry.

Truly, truly sorry.

I just can’t let Snow White...or anyone else for that matter...take that step down.  You see, I know Snow better than she knows herself. I do know which buttons to push.  And I know I pushed the ones that got her angry at me.

You know that she’s a fighter.  And she’s going to fight the evil that’s growing in her.  And that is where you come in my darling.  I know she’s going to fight the evil as hard as she can.  I want her to.  I need her to.  And she’s going to need someone to get her through all the rough patches she’s about to go through.

A savior.

Help her please. Snow White needs you , my love. Try to steer her the right way.  Make sure she doesn’t turn out like me.

Please.

To _MY_ savior....with all my heart...

_ Regina...  _

* * *

 

PS....By the way, I DID take my heart out and looked at it.  My heart is lighter.  Maybe that’s you....

* * *

 

 

**FIN**

  
  
  
  



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